Friday, July 08, 2005

Alone again

Friend:
"You know, I was once mistaken. I meant to introduce F to Mas XYZ one day".
Me:
"Uh huh" (listening intently).
Friend:
"But then I couldn't find him in his room. So we went back to F's cubicle. There F told me that she was about to marry in three weeks! When I met Mas XYZ, I told him to forget my idea of introducing F to him".
Me:
"So Mas XYZ really means it when he said he's going to look for a second wife."
Friend:
"Oops! Didn't you know it? He just divorced his wife".
Me:
(Stunned)


Too many times I heard of the word "cerai" (English: divorce) being spoken lately. It's no longer a word that I frequently hear being said on TV; It's a word that now becomes spoken so often like the word "getting a baby", because it's not just celebrities who dare to commit divorce nowadays. Sadly, the "divorce" virus has gotten to people close to me. To mention a few, there have been my ex-office mate and current office mate; my ex-campus colleague; and my cousin who have been through the awful experience.

The reason of separation is different between one person to another, but the grand theme is the "unfit that cannot be tolerated anylonger". For someone who hasn't got married like me, this epidemy creates a new sense of fear. Previously the question that keeps bugging me is "Will I ever get married?", now a nouveau tingling question adds to my things-to-worry list: When I eventually get married, will my marriage survive to the day I (or my partner) die(s)?

Men.
When they don't worry, they complain.

9 comments:

Lili said...

mengalirlah bagai air.
Jika riak datang dan terhadang batu karang, air tetap mencari celah untuk mengalir.

So, don't be afraid. Kitanya yg harus fleksibel alias liquid bagai air.

Kalau nanti beneran married, enjoy ajah. Dan mengalah untuk menang, seperti air, cari celah. Insya Allah akan ada jalan keluar, supaya tidak bercerai.

Ummi dah 6 tahun menikah. Insya Allah.

ayo, sering mampir yah.

Anonymous said...

ndak usah takut menikah metty...menikah itu proses belajar kok, asal dua pihak menyadarinya, maka insya allah rumah tangga akan teguh walaupun badai menghantam, amin.

*)Iin

Anonymous said...

Met, katanya sih, kalo emang gak bisa bertahan jangan dipertahankan. Kalo mau terus bertahan ya harus siap untuk sakit. Wong udah gak bisa bertahan kok. It's a question of choice.

Anonymous said...

Hai... betul tuh nikah juga sebagian dari pembelajaran, so kalo ada 'riak2' dikit dalam proses tsb. wajar aja kok....
Asal kitanya msh enjoy & ingat sama komitmen awal sebelum nikah, dijamin pernikahan kita akan 'survive'

Rgds
Ida- has been married for 3 years by next month

ruthy said...

Met...
semuanya perlu proses belajar & mengenal..apalagi dalam hal relationship..makanya pas pacaran itu bener2 digunain untuk mengenal semua-muaanyaa....at least mengenal pacar 3 tahun deh..soalnya kalo beberapa bulan or setahun kayaknya sifat aslinya belom keluar....

trus kalo udah cocok par-cok..dan siap untuk married yaa married lah...dan itu proses belajar juga...

jangan liat orang2 yang cerai aja, banyak juga tooh temen2, sodara2 or coworkers and maybe your parents too yang happy2 aja married til death do us part....jadi mesti liat 2 sisi, jangan liat yang buruk2 aja..ntar gag maju2 dong...

dan 2 pihak mesti punya fondasi yang sama: married cuma sekali...gitu...

Wira said...

Just don't get married with the wrong person.. no pain no gain Metty :)

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm thinking to get married soon. The question is: Whom am I going to married with.


*) heri

rikagelar said...

mbak mettyyyy...top abis deh englishnya..

mbak, reading your words was like watching powerful movie or something...

yang penting visi menikah mbak..untuk ibadah..jadi kita bisa toleransi dengan hal2 yang tidak terlalu berhubungan dengan ibadah hehehe...

keep up your beautiful story-writing ya mbak!

metty said...

halo semua!!!
so nice to read all your comments.
setuju bgt, jgn takut pada komitmen pernikahan. asal punya ilmunya, insyaallah selamat sampai di tujuan, begitu kan?
tp gimana dong kalau ingin menikah tp gak boleh? hiks, hiks...

to rika:
thanks honey. i'll try to keep writing.